Tag Archives: together

Together

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As the oldest of
2 girls raised
together,
I sometimes wished
someone else was
older to be “responsible”.

However, my younger sister
was always great at backing me
up.

Once when a group of girls in high school decided to pick on me
(on a daily basis)
they thought it would be
an added slight to include
my younger sister in their activities
while excluding me.

She listened to what they had to say
then came straight to me and related the entire business, explaining that
they now understood that she
had my back.

I have never forgotten the comfort her loyalty and love brought me.

Years later,
when I was living in Europe
my sister would email me regularly just to keep in touch.

She once sent me a song by Matthew West (the motions) and said,
“You are the only person I know who doesn’t have to say they haven’t given their all.

When I was in need of surgery she stayed the night in my hospital room acting as my personal nurse.

(Which was a huge thing as her husband and two little ones stayed home.)

Even last year she jumped in and taught a high school class when the teacher had to suddenly resign due to family illness.

So I can say even as adults my sister and I are
together.

And I am very thankful for the Lord blessing me with a sister.

As I raise my girls,
and speak to them about being
“responsible ”
for themselves and each other
I find that often
I use my own experience
as examples.

I often remind them that they don’t get a choice
who
their siblings are.

They don’t get a
choice
when
they were born
(1st, 2nd, 3rd,).

They only get to
choose
how
they will treat
the others.

Because together
is a privilege
as well as
a “responsibility”.

“If someone says,  ‘I love God,’ and hates his brother,  he is a liar;  for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen,  how can he love God whom he has not seen?”  1 John 4:20

Orange blossoms

blossoms“Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent: and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death.” Gen. 24:67
At the beginning of a marriage there is a certain amount of expectation, dreams, and joy.
Little girls dream of the flowers and gowns and the perfect man who will sweep them off their feet.
Although it is rare to hear a little boy talk about when they grow up and get married it seems to be at the heart of most men to be understood, carried for, and loved in the way only a wife can fulfill.
While listening to a young man who has been a friend of our family for sometime talk about the opportunity to bring the woman he is going to marry over for dinner, it was clear his future holds expectations, and dreams, and joy.
And a marriage that begins without these things would be a sad affair indeed.
But the Bible makes it clear that although God ordained marriage and has built a wonderful thing when he constructed marriage, it is under that same curse—sin—that the world suffers from. (Gen. 2:22-24, Gen. 3)
To add to this already unsteady beginning, the building is often not built on a solid foundation of God cracks can show up readily.
And as has been the pattern in so many homes there is often a breaking when one or both parties decides that the structure should never have been built and then the wrecking ball of divorce blows apart the shattered and tattered people who once resided inside.
But then there are those, like my parents dear friends, who walk through this life hand in hand for 60 or more years.
Were they a mere fluke?
Did they have something others were denied, small problems, always a good job, healthy, lots of brilliant children who never had a mistake or a broken tooth, or limb or relationship?
No.
Like Isaac and Rebekah, who were married their entire lives, they had problems.
For Rebekah waited for years to have a child and when she became pregnant it soon became apparent something was amiss.
Her sons would never be the close companions that parents hope for.
Isaac and Rebekah would never see eye to eye on their sons, He loved Esau, she loved Jacob.
Esau’s marriage was a grief to both his parents.
All marriages have to withstand the storms of life.
It is not always the choice of both people that the house be torn down, sometimes for one reason or another one makes the choice and the structure is broken.
But for those who are discussing building this wonderful structure and those like myself who have lived in one for a while we need to remember a few things.
Marriage was created by God and it was good, sin is what has marred it.
Anything of true value takes effort.
Storms will come but those who are watching and prepared for them often weather them better than those who are caught off guard and unprepared.
Marriage is not about I but WE—
There is nothing as important as time, time together, time to connect, time invested in the building and maintenance of this so precious thing called marriage.
LOVE is a verb not necessarily an emotion.
Large construction projects do not make up for daily maintenance, dry rot and termites can filter in and decimate if not looked after on a daily basis.
The best foundation is one laid on a relationship with Jesus Christ and if only one party of the marriage does so it can cause an unstable and fragile relationship.
The heart that trusts in the Lord for everything, including the building and maintenance of their marriage shall find a wise and strong contractor, but they must do exactly as they are instructed no matter what the fee.
Whether you are single, or married, or divorced, remember that the Lord wants to walk forward with you in your future and has a beautiful plan for your life—it won’t look like what you expect, but if you trust Him you will never be alone.