Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Hebrews 11:1 KJV
Dear Lord Jesus, Thank You for truth. Thank You for Your Word. Thank You for salvation and Your amazing love. Lord, it is through Your Word I find hope, confident expectation. It is in You my faith grows daily, by knowing You and learning how to trust more and more. Lord, thank You for this journey of life. Thank You for the blessings and the trials, for all of it is used by You to hone my heart, to teach me Your ways that I might walk in them. Lord Jesus, You are incredible. The peace and comfort I find in You are beyond anything the world has to offer. The joy in daily placing my life in Your hand is beyond anything I could ever attain elsewhere. Lord, You are good. You are faithful. You are God Almighty. I trust You with all things. Lord Jesus, I humbly bring to You my family, please provide and protect them. Please bring them into a closer walk with You each day. Lord Jesus, I lift up my husband, please place Your hand upon him. Let his heart not grow faint in service to You and those You have called him to serve. Please give him ability and wisdom to do all he does to Your glory. Lord, the innocent, please protect them. Please return the prodigal and save those who have yet to know You. I know You are always seeking the lost, calling their names, offering them life eternal. Please let hearts be softened, ears unstopped, and eyes opened to Your truth. Thank You, Lord. Amen.
I hope, dear Reader, you don’t get weary of my rose pictures.
It’s my favorite and I never get tired of looking at it.
One of the convictions I have is to be as real in my posts as possible.
To safely and appropriately allow you to see what the Lord is doing in my life and my family.
Frankly, it doesn’t always come easily.
But I am convinced that through my transparency, the Lord will be given all the glory.
I never want someone to see my life and say, “Well that’s just you. It’s easy for you because…”
I’m so far from being the reason I can do or have done anything at all.
Yesterday was another example of that truth.
I’d been struggling with being very tired for a while.
But honestly, thought it was just due to the extra things I’ve been doing.
I’ve always struggled with pushing myself too hard.
So, it’s common for me to wear myself out.
However, yesterday morning I knew I was more than just tired.
It was a humbling experience.
It began with calling the doctor’s office.
The receptionist was very kind and pretty soon told me to go to the lab and then be at the office at 10:30.
Due to my extreme discomfort, I was unable to keep my voice smooth.
She was very nice about it, which I appreciated.
I can hear the question: “What was going on?”
Well…-sigh-…I have another UTI.
One of the side effects of my daily inhaler is the possibility of developing a UTI more easily.
I take a supplement everyday in an effort to combat that.
However, it’s still something I have to deal with.
I was very thankful for my doctor, who got me right in.
As I stood at the lab, I was not feeling well, at all.
Despite all my efforts, I couldn’t keep the tears from coming to my eyes as she asked me questions.
She too was very kind.
Her parting words were: “I hope you feel better soon.”
My uncontrollable emotions were embarrassing me.
I hate crying.
So, I really can’t put into words how I felt when my doctor came in and sat down.
My discomfort was obvious and my frustration at being sick with this again ( I was just in last month for the same thing) couldn’t be held in check.
Tears began to spring from my eyes as my voice cracked.
Inside myself I was more embarrassed about my lack of self control than anything, but some part of me was pleading: “I just want to get well!”
I didn’t say any of that, but just that I woke up and was experiencing a lot of discomfort.
I apologized for my emotions.
Thankfully, my doctor is amazing.
He didn’t turn away or act embarrassed.
He gently offered me the tissue box.
I took one and worked hard at pulling it together.
His voice and manner were exactly what I needed and I was able to contain myself.
I left shortly afterwards.
Anne drove us to Sis’s house where we could wait for my prescription and of course to tell her what the doctor said.
As we traveled, I thought back through it all.
I realized my biggest issue isn’t my physical problems.
It’s my attitude.
Yes, I can be honest and say I get sick of being sick.
However, when that creeps in, I know I’m looking at the wrong thing.
So, I began to praise God.
Starting with thanking God for the perspective adjustment. and then on to the huge numbers of people I’m so thankful for.
My doctors and nurses. (You get blessed with more if you have to see a specialist.)
My friends who pray for me.
My pharmacist and the people who work there.
It’s such an overwhelming blessing to be treated with such care and love.
I truly don’t deserve any of it.
But Jesus blesses me anyway.
Because of His boundless love.
I’m doing better today.
Both with my physical and my emotional self.
As I spoke with the Lord this morning He talked about transparency.
I wasn’t excited about writing a blog and sharing my struggles.
Yet, His gentle voice spoke deeply to my heart.
You need to be transparent about this.
“Yes, Lord. Whatever brings You glory, even my weakest moments.
And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. II Corinthians 12:9 NKJV
Dear Lord Jesus,
Thank You for yesterday. Thank You for walking with me even when I’m struggling the most. I know I can always trust You and that Your ways are perfect. Thank You for reminding me that life isn’t about what I can or can’t do. It’s about learning to lovingly trust You in every detail. Lord, for those people who are struggling just now, please help them to learn this same lesson. Let their hearts be turned to You. Let them find comfort in Your Word. I love You, Jesus. Thank You. Amen.
Like a rose with thorns, this life’s beauty can often be riddled with pain.
“My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. “ James 1:2
What is to be done when trials come?
How is tragedy to be handled?
When discouragement whispers louder each day and seems to be more truth than fiction–
Maybe I am the only one who lays awake,
Stripped down to the bone and gristle of emotion
Numb from the pain,
Trying to sort out what to do next.
But I doubt it.
I know others who have shared their pain with me,
Their moments of doubt,
And I hold them in my heart wondering how best to act, how to help shoulder the load.
For that is my heart cry:
But what do we do with trials?
How do we guard from discouragement?
Where do we turn when the terrible strikes?
I have a dear friend,
Who I have heard say that James 1:2 means, for them, to be joyful not because the trial is fun, or that they like the trial,
(For it stinks!) They add.
But because they can have joy in the Lord.
In the shadow I have struggled finding it.
In the moments of naked darkness,
When joy seemed a distant memory–
A hand has reached into mine and held me up.
The times when all seemed desolate
My Lord Jesus has been there,
For me I can have joy in the trial,
Peace in the shadow,
Comfort in the broken.
And patience has grown.
I no longer despair as I have in the past that the night shall never end,
The tunnel never break into sunshine,
Instead I slip my fingers around my Savior’s hand,