Inadequate

I was feeling embarrassed.

And frustrated, because we unintentionally made it impossible for me to reach the ornaments box when rearranging the garage this fall.

All we had were a few balls which wouldn’t fit in that tote.

I kept trying to come up with solutions, but everything I prayed about felt like a closed door.

It wasn’t until this morning that I realized the problem.

My motivation wasn’t Jesus.

I instantly repented.

Only then was I able to see the blessing.

My prayer for this holiday was for our family to be focused upon Jesus.

Now that I’m looking at Jesus, our Christmas tree is an answer to my prayer.

The white lights remind me that Jesus is the Light of the World.

John 8:12 KJV — Then spake Jesus again unto them, saying, I am the light of the world: he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life.

The red Christmas balls reminds me that He died to grant us the gift of salvation.

Matthew 26:28 KJV — For this is my blood of the new testament, which is shed for many for the remission of sins.

The only ornament this year, hangs at eye level, front and center.

Revelation 1:5-6 KJV — And from Jesus Christ, who is the faithful witness, and the first begotten of the dead, and the prince of the kings of the earth. Unto him that loved us, and washed us from our sins in his own blood, And hath made us kings and priests unto God and his Father; to him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen.

I no longer feel our tree is inadequate.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your blessings! Thank You for showing me a new way to look at things. Lord, You continually amaze me at how You use even the tiniest details in my life. Lord, thank You. I know that we wouldn’t be celebrating Your birth of You hadn’t died and risen to give us new life through You. Your ways are perfect. Your truth is incredible. You are worthy of glory, honor, and praise. May this holiday season be filled to overflowing with the truth of Your life and the gift of salvation. Without You we are lost. Thank You, for Your boundless love, Jesus. In Your name I pray. Amen.

Unexpected answer

It was many weeks ago, when I found out my allergist office was being closed.

I was saddened, mostly by what seemed a loss of relationship.

For me to continue with my doctor, I’d need to drive over an hour away.

I only get shots once a month, unless I’m doing a series, so it wasn’t unreasonable to think of driving that far once a month.

Somehow, I wasn’t excited about the idea.

Yet, I couldn’t get peace about switching to a new doctor in my area.

So, I waited and prayed.

God answered.

I received a lovely card and paperwork in the mail from my allergist.

She is opening her own office, right here.

I don’t have to drive over an hour away.

Besides signing my name to some paperwork and remembering where the new office is, I don’t even have much to do.

I’m very thankful.

God is always faithful.

He always guides and directs.

And I don’t have to say, “Goodbye” to any of the staff save my shot nurse, she’s retiring.

I’m so thankful I didn’t rush out and find a new allergist.

I’m so grateful God provided for this.

2 Samuel 22:31 KJV — As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is tried: he is a buckler to all them that trust in him.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for this unexpected answer. Lord, thank You for reminding me to wait upon You and not try to “fix” things myself. Lord, thank You for using this circumstance to teach me just how valuable even the brief relationships at the doctor’s office are. Lord, I lift up those who serve others in the medical field. Please continue to guide them, to give them love, discernment, and understanding. Lord, please gift them with the ability to treat the person not just the health issue. Thank You for Your amazing love and wisdom. Thank You that You are the reason we have knowledge and understanding. Thank You that You are the One who heals us. I love You. Amen

Holding my hand

For some time now, I’ve been praying for this.

I’ve learned from the past.

My heart knows that the best way is to ask God and then act upon what He directs.

Of course, I also spoke with Bell.

I wanted to give her a shower which would bless her.

We agreed that it would be a pleasure to work along side her fiance’s mother and sisters, her best friend, Anne and Sis, as well as my sister and mother.

Bell blessed me by requesting that I handle the decor.

So, after getting the things which were important to her, I began to prayerfully prepare.

It has been a truly wonderful walk with the Lord.

From small details to making things, God has guided my every step.

As the date approached I found myself worrying.

“Lord, I have to drive down, meet up with…”

Trust Me.

“Father, my asthma is struggling today, what about…”

Trust Me.

“Lord, I love this outfit, but shouldn’t I wear something else and change, or maybe…”

Trust Me.

The night before the shower I prayed.

My emotions were in control, but my thoughts continued to bring in worry.

Finally, I felt I had placed it all back in the Lord’s hands and fell asleep.

And I had a dream.

I was with the Lord.

He was simply listening to me.

Because I was telling Him everything I was concerned about.

He calmly reached out and took my right hand in His.

He squeezed it gently and said,

You don’t need to worry, I’m with you.

When I woke,

the memory of the dream was so fresh I could almost feel His hand holding mine.

The day was so full.

I didn’t have much opportunity to rest, but it didn’t matter.

Jesus was with me.

Details and the schedule changed, but it didn’t matter.

Jesus was with me.

As always, the unexpected happened, but it didn’t matter.

Jesus was with me.

Throughout the entire day, God’s peace just clung to me.

I walked through every moment with His abilities carrying me and found such joy in it all.

God brought many people alongside to give what I needed at the moment.

He brought people we love, to share our daughter’s celebration of her wedding.

When it was over, He brought many helping hands to clean it all up.

I wish I could have written each person’s name down, so I could thank God for each individual.

But even in that, God knows.

When my husband asked the next morning, “How did it go?” I knew exactly what to say.

“It was a miracle.”

What a joy it is to seek God, listen for His answers, and then walk in His ways.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You so much for all You did to bless our daughter and soon to be son. Please continue to pour into their lives that they might being this new family by seeking You, listening for Your answers, and walking in it with faith. Lord, You are incredible. I love You. Thank You for first loving me.

Answers

It’s been several days.

I’ve been seeking the Lord for direction and guidance for our family.

My prayer: “Lord let us know what Your will is.”

The answer came yesterday.

But it didn’t look like what I expected.

It wasn’t a comfortable circumstance.

Yet, our direction was clear.

As I went to bed, I thanked God for His direction, although was still a little emotionally prickled by the form.

I hadn’t realized it until this morning.

Without really thinking about the words my emotions were asking God, “Why did the answer have to come that way?”

With my first thoughts this morning He answered.

You wanted direction and I gave it.

I chose that tool to make it very clear to you and your husband.

And my response had been to be focused on my own discomfort, rather than praising God for answering.

I had to wonder.

Would my husband and I have accepted His guidance if He’d used a different circumstance?

I can say, my perspective changed in that moment.

I began to praise God for His direction and guidance.

My heart thanked Him for His Sovereignty.

I looked at my life and began to see a long series of circumstances which were uncomfortable, some very painful, and I could look back at how God’s hand of direction was in each.

Although I didn’t enjoy walking through those things, I am praising God for them.

He has used trials, pain, and all manner of life’s struggles to direct, guide, and hone me.

As difficult as those things were, I am praising God for them.

As uncomfortable as some things are, I’m praising God for them.

I don’t want to live without Him, and He said to take up my cross and follow Him.

He wasn’t walking to a picnic when He carried His cross.

I shouldn’t expect one either.

Following Christ, carrying His cross, brings so much reward.

His path broke the chains of sin and death forever!

Then He rose, and He walked a little longer with mankind on the Earth.

And now He is preparing a place for all who believe in His name, what He did, and who He is, God’s Son.

Part of that preparation is a wedding feast, the marriage of the Lamb.

Yes, I want to carry my cross and follow Him.

For the days of struggle, trials, and pain are few compared to the joy which eternity holds.

I praise God for His path for me.

And I’ll take a wedding feast over a picnic any day!

Psalm 16:11 NKJV — You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

A day of answered prayer

It’s not been very fun.

I’ve been struggling with migraines off and on for two weeks.

Yesterday morning greeted me with the same migraine I’d gone to bed with.

It wasn’t exactly a welcoming way to wake up.

Yet, the Lord’s soft voice reminded me to trust.

Time with the Lord helped me sort out my emotions and my priorities.

My prayer request, which I shared with a friend and our children, was my resting in the Lord’s hands.

Especially since we were expecting to have Pastor and his wife over for supper.

We are just getting to know the body here, and with the appointment, my “to do” list was longer than usual.

With all these things on my mind, I knew my struggle would be with letting go of the desires I’d already formed and simply trusting God with it all.

Personally, I had been praying for my husband.

He had shared his own request with me the night before.

Prayer for our daughters, the two in college, has been a continuous thread in my conversations with Jesus.

Throughout the earliest part of the morning the Lord brought several people to mind and heart.

It is always a pleasure to lift up others in prayer, but it can also be exhausting.

Since my body was already struggling, even praying seemed to require more effort.

Yet, I knew I could rest in God’s love.

It was mid morning.

I’d been struggling through teaching homeschool.

Our sweet Anne had made me a heat pack for my head.

I’d closed my eyes for a moment, trying to pray for strength to do what was required.

It was incredible.

My migraine melted away.

Before too long, I was able to share with the kids and text my friend the praise report.

It was such a pleasure to be free from the pain.

As the day went on I received a text.

It was relating a fact which was another answer to prayer.

It was an amazing answer to years of prayer, one I’d prayed on faith alone, because circumstances did nothing to show it as being possible.

My heart rejoiced.

God was teaching me, speaking with me, about His faithfulness.

These days of restrictions physically have worn me down emotionally.

The voice of doubt has whispered, “Will you ever be well?” too often of late.

Battling the enemy can wear upon the soul.

God was lifting my heart.

And He wasn’t finished.

That afternoon I received a call from one of our college students.

She was excited to relate circumstances which support and encourage her endeavors at school.

It was another answered prayer.

When my husband arrived home, he was in great spirits.

He shared with me how God had really answered his prayer request of the previous night.

It brought tears to my eyes as I listened to yet another answered prayer.

Pastor and his wife arrived and we all had a lovely time of fellowship and getting to know one another.

As I prepared for bed, reflecting on our conversation, it occurred to me that it was another answered prayer.

I’d asked God several times throughout the day to bless our time together.

And that’s exactly what occurred.

In the moment of reflection God’s truth was apparent.

The enemy might be able to fling discouragement and doubt at me.

My body might be frail or in pain.

Life might require courage and trust to face the unknown.

But nothing compares to the faithfulness of Christ Jesus.

He is worthy of all praise and honor.

His Word is life.

His love is true.

His salvation is perfect.

Dear Jesus,

Thank You so much for so many answered prayers. Thank You for carrying me through each and every day. Thank You for holding me in Your hands. No matter the circumstances, You are faithful. Thank You!