Tractor

Shhh! Don’t tell him, but this is part of our grandson’s 3rd birthday gift.

He loves tractors and gets so excited when he’s allowed to sit on my husband’s riding lawnmower, when it’s parked (without the keys) in the barn.

His enthusiasm was great when they were over on Friday and our field was being cut for hay.

Although, I can appreciate tractors as useful, I have never found them as entertaining.

If anything, I was terrified of tractors as a youth.

The Tractor Safety Class our parents enrolled us in didn’t help my fears.

The videos of tractor accidents was enough to give me nightmares.

But I kept trying to get over it and learn about how to be safe while operating a tractor.

Our class was nearing it’s conclusion when we found out the passing test was a field day.

It wasn’t until we’d been dropped off by our parents that my younger sister and I realized we were in trouble.

We’d been sitting in a classroom for weeks listening to lectures or watching videos, but never done anything with an actual tractor.

Our father hadn’t allowed us any time on the tractor or even around it, because he wanted us to pass our safety class first.

Now we were facing a school parking lot which had been turned into a tractor handling field test.

There was a tractor which had to be driven through an obstacle course.

There was a tractor hooked to a round bailer which had to be backed up a slant into a coned off area which was supposed to replicate a shed.

There was a tractor which had to be hitched and then driven forward and then unhitched from a piece of machinery.

There was…well, you get the idea.

I felt like crying.

After we were signed in and told to join the first line we looked around hoping to ask for help from someone and realized we didn’t know a single person there. 

Our instructor hadn’t come either.

Whispering about our predicament to each other, we were surprised to hear a voice behind us.

“Hey, are you new? I never saw you in my class before.”

He looked to be about my sister’s age (11).

We explained where we from and that we had been in a different class, but were new to the area.

Upon his friendly inquiry we also related our extreme distress over the circumstance we were in.

“You mean you’ve never driven a tractor before?”

We shook our heads.

He smiled kindly and quickly responded, “Well! Let me in front of you. You don’t mind do you? I’ll tell you all you need to know and then you can watch me and just do as I do. Don’t worry, you’ll both pass, no problem.”

I immediately stepped aside and let him in front of me, no one cared, because we were the last three in line.

He began quickly telling us everything he knew about the tractor we were going to handle first.

“You know about the correct side to get on a tractor–“

We shook our heads.

“Boy, they didn’t teach you anything about using a tractor in your class? No matter, always approach the tractor on…”

He spent the entire test teaching us and then being the example.

It worked.

We all passed the test.

Since I was 13, I knew I couldn’t hug him, but I sure felt like it.

I knew we’d both have failed miserably if he’d not taken the time and effort to help.

This moment in my middle school years has been repeated many times, but in a far greater way.

Jesus stepped in and took the time and effort to help me not fail a far more important test.

Through His sacrifice and His life I have been cleansed from unrighteousness and given the instruction on how to walk with integrity through each day.

Every morning, when I wake, He’s ready and waiting to share with me His instructions for my day, encourage me as I face individual problems or circumstances, and supply all I need.

And it’s a never ending thing.

Matthew 28:20 NKJV — “teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Amen.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for that boy, so many years ago. Thank You for how You helped us through him. Lord, I know You are my greatest help and the One who supplies all my needs. I know You provide for me in ways I could never anticipate and You use things in my life I never expect You to. Lord, thank You. It’s incredible how You work all things together for good for those called according to Your purposes. Please continue to teach, direct, guide, and instruct me in Your Word that I might not sin against You. I want to honor You in all my actions, attitudes, and words. I want my life to be a reflection of Your Word and bring glory to Your name. Thank You! Amen.

Where your treasure is…

Material possessions have always been very important to me.

As a child my biggest fear was our house catching fire, because I was afraid I’d not be able to get all my special stuffed animals and dolls out the window in time.

With adulthood and marriage I began to learn that stuff is not treasure.

Although, I had a desire for stuff, especially when planning for the birth of our baby, but it was of secondary importance to my husband and our daughter.

They were my precious treasures.

Matthew 6:21 KJV — For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

As God blessed us with more children possessions dropped farther and farther away from my heart.

Within those years of babies, I began to realize another treasure I had, one I’d previously taken for granted: my Bible.

As a young wife and mother I realized my desperate need for God’s daily instruction.

With my time in the Word of God, I realized a truth which is completely counter to mankind’s natural tendencies towards their treasure.

Treasure is meant to be shared.

Each of our children are priceless gifts to us, but God never intended us to horde them

Instead, we were to train them, love them, encourage them, and prepare them to be sent out to be a blessing and treasure to others as well as us.

The same is true for the Word of God.

It’s meant to be shared.

Thus, as each day passes and my husband, our family, and God’s Word become dearer to me than ever, I find myself surprised by how God has multiplied my treasures as I share them.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your Word. Thank You that You gave us the most amazing treasure, Yourself! Thank You that we can have peace and security here on Each because our souls were purchased at such a a high price. Thank You for Your blessings. Thank You so much for my husband, thank You for our children, our sons-in-law, and our grandchildren. Thank You for Your daily gifts of life. Thank You for every good gift. Please continue to teach me how to share my precious treasures. Lord Jesus, You are my greatest treasure of all. Thank You! I love You. Amen.

Doctor’s appointment

I feel ridiculous even admitting this, but I had a moment of fear.

Due to my struggles with asthma, my husband requested I send a note to the doctor and request an appointment.

They called and scheduled an appointment for next week.

After I hung up, it hit: fear.

Why?

Well, to be completely honest, I’ve under gone many different medical treatments in my life and I’m weary of trying anything more.

Which is really dumb, because all of it has been to help me overcome different health issues.

And since my flesh had dug in it’s heals, in rebellion, fear crept through, which then sideswiped my thoughts with, “What if they make you run more tests?” “What if you have to return to taking______?” “What if—

That’s where I stopped it.

I realized the damage I had allowed and opened my Bible app.

Trust in the LORD, and do good; So shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. Delight thyself also in the LORD; And he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.
Psalm 37:3‭-‬4 KJV

“Thank You, Jesus!”

I sighed and texted my husband about my appointment.

Then, I surrendered myself to the Lord, asked His forgiveness, and found encouragement.

It doesn’t matter what happens at the doctor’s appointment, because God is with me and will see me through whatever comes.

And I want to encourage you, dear reader, that the same is true for you.

If you will place your trust in Jesus Christ, surrender to His lordship, and rest in His promises, He will comfort, guide, and direct you and you’ll find fear will lose it’s hold.

It doesn’t matter what the enemy uses to try and make us afraid, what matters is whether or not we walk in the lies of Satan or the truth of Christ Jesus.

Commit thy way unto the LORD; Trust also in him; And he shall bring it to pass. And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, And thy judgment as the noonday.
Psalm 37:5‭-‬6 KJV

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your Word. Thank You for Your truth and the ways You walk us through the tricks of the enemy. Thank You for showing me where my flesh has rebelled and thank You for bringing me to repentance. Lord, my life is not my own, it belongs to You and was purchased at such a high price. No matter what, I want to live it with integrity and honor You continually, praising You for these opportunities each day. Thank You so much for Your love. You are awesome and I worship You, Jesus. Amen.

Grandma

She was big on personality, although packaged relatively small for American standards.

Dad always attributed it to her lineage, stating, “It’s the Greek.”

Grandma’s father was from Greece and although we have a cherished picture of him and Great Grandma, Grandma didn’t know him.

He was a doctor and died from the disease he was treating his patients for, leaving behind three young boys and a baby daughter.

Yet, I don’t ever remember Grandma referring to her loss or commenting on life being “unfair”.

If anything, she seemed to see it as her duty to remain as upbeat as possible when the family was visiting.

Her laugh was frequent.

Her voice could be gentle with love or pitched with correction.

It seemed her dog, our Aunt’s dog, was always misbehaving whenever we came to see her, and thus the voice of correction.

Not that she’d refrain from correcting people, I recall her doing both with equal energy.

Sometimes she worried and fretted, but she always had a smile ready for me whenever I was around her.

Her wrinkled hands would clasp mine and she’d put her face up to kiss my cheek.

No one would have guessed, by her words or actions, that I’m not her granddaughter.

She never treated me as “just the gal married to her grandson”, but instead embraced me as family.

One of my most cherished memories was her deep compassion on the loss of my father.

She and Grandpa had met both my parents first at our wedding and then at Thanksgiving.

My father was killed in an accident the following October, and the next time I saw Grandma and Grandpa, she pulled me aside and spoke with me.

She related how shocked and saddened she and Grandpa were when they heard.

She gave me a big hug and her voice showed me how truly she felt my loss.

There are many other moments I cherish.

The most recent one was the last time I saw Grandma.

My husband’s sisters had organized a date and time for us to meet up near Grandma’s house and after some group pictures in the park we went out to eat.

It was very special.

My husband’s oldest sister had driven all the way from another state just to be there.

Among the party was our oldest daughter and her family.

Watching Grandma’s eyes light up as she looked on her great great grandchildren was truly priceless.

She was too weak to hold them, but there were many pictures taken that day, including Grandma surrounded by the youngest members of the family, her great grandchildren and great great grandchildren, ages from about 5 to under a year old.

I’m so glad we have that memory, for Grandma passed away yesterday afternoon.

We’d heard that morning she was in the ICU and the prayer request was for my husband’s parents to be able to make it down in time to see her once more.

We praised God when we heard that they were with Grandma to the last.

Grief is never easy, whether the loved one was young or old doesn’t change the loss.

Romans 14:7 NKJV — For none of us lives to himself, and no one dies to himself.

Yet, I’m so thankful to God for His understanding, His compassion, and His promises.

Jesus, Himself suffered grief, and He came to preserve us from an even greater suffering; separation from God for eternity in Hell.

John 11:33-35 NKJV — Therefore, when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her weeping, He groaned in the spirit and was troubled. 34 And He said, “Where have you laid him?” They said to Him, “Lord, come and see.” 35 Jesus wept.

What unmeasurable comfort there is when we know this world is not all there is.

What joy and expectation there is when the confidence of a home in Heaven awaits those who call on the Lord Jesus.

Romans 10:9 KJV — That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your love. Thank You for salvation which brings us hope and comfort even during loss. Lord, thank You that You alone are worthy of all honor, all glory, all praise. It is in You we find hope and through Your sacrificial gift we find eternity. Thank You! I love that grief is risen by hope of a future together with You. Lord, thank You for all Your love. Thank You for Your Word. Thank You for our family. I love You. Amen.

Trees

The size and shape of this tree impressed me.

Long ago, my appreciation for trees was begun.

There was a big Silver Maple tree in the front yard of my childhood home.

I honestly can’t remember when I learned to climb that tree, but I spent many hours in it’s branches.

In fact, it was my favorite place to be.

I felt safe.

It was also where I let my imagination run wild.

My tree was often an entire forest.

Deer, birds, and even rabbits found a home there and, of course, were all friendly with me.

I wouldn’t have recognized it then, but somehow my imagination was taking me to the paintings I’d seen in the Big Picture Bible of the Garden of Eden.

That’s what I was pretending in my tree.

My tree climbing ended when we moved to a different state.

My heart’s longing for a place of peace, beauty, and plenty didn’t disappear.

Instead, as I matured and grew in my understanding of scripture, I recognized the longing.

My heart wanted a world without sin, and the security of a relationship with Jesus Christ.

God used my childhood playtime, in that big Silver Maple, to teach me about myself and my need for Him.

I still enjoy trees.

The variety of them is impressive.

They remind me of the promises of God and lend themselves to the grandeur of God’s creation, pointing me to gratitude and worship of Almighty God.

Psalm 104:16 KJV — The trees of the LORD are full of sap; the cedars of Lebanon, which he hath planted;

Psalm 104:24 KJV — O LORD, how manifold are thy works! in wisdom hast thou made them all: the earth is full of thy riches.

I’m very thankful for trees and how God uses so many seemingly insignificant things to touch my heart.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your creation. Thank You for the beauty which is awesome and inspiring. Lord, from the waves breaking on the rocky shore to the delicate veins of a tree leaf, Your creation is amazing, it’s awe inspiring. The beauty of a butterfly’s wings, the height of the mountains, the songs of the birds, it’s all incredible and I thank You for it. Lord, how great are Your works and greatly to be praised. You created it all good in the beginning and You came to redeem us from our sins, cleansing us from our own choices. Lord, how great You are and greatly to be praised! Your ways are perfect. Your truth is life. Your promises are sure. You will do all that You have set out to do. Thank You! Great are You, Lord! I praise Your holy name! May the whole earth be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord. Amen.

God answers prayer

James 5:16 KJV — Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

It’s true and I’m living proof that the prayer of a righteous man avails much.

I suffer from asthma, allergies, and have a rare form of dysphonia, which is a fancy word for chronic laryngitis.

Thus, our family has been learning ASL so we can communicate when my voice turns off.

Palm Sunday, in 2022, I was one of several people prayed for, and God answered.

No one at our church had heard my voice before, in fact several people thought I was deaf and mute.

But during that prayer my voice returned and I’ve been able to speak at our church ever since.

However, this Spring, I have been sick off and on, for months.

It’s really taken a toll on me and my asthma has become more challenging.

Saturday, I was outside when I realized wasn’t breathing well.

By the time I got into the house, my coughing had become an attack.

I texted my husband, as my rescue inhaler wasn’t working, he was busy in the shop.

I couldn’t think clearly, but remembered that sometimes it will get clogged and need to be washed out, which I did.

Unfortunately, it still wasn’t working.

I tried reading the inhaler, to see the number of remaining doses, but I couldn’t see it, my vision was blurry.

I started trying to get to where my replacement was, but only made it halfway.

“Help me, Lord!”

He answered.

My husband walked in.

He knew exactly what to do and got my nebulizer treatment which stopped the attack.

We both praised God for His help.

Sunday morning, I was weak , but felt I could go to church and did well until we were leaving.

A neighbor was burning and the smoke was right outside the door I came out.

I made it to the car, and got my rescue inhaler, which worked, because my husband replaced the other one.

When I returned for prayer meeting, I made sure not to go to the same side of the church and I looked for smoke before I got out of the car.

I didn’t see any, but it hit me just as I was nearing the door.

My voice disappeared, but I didn’t have an attack.

No one at prayer knows ASL, so my efforts to explain what was happening didn’t really work, but I knew everyone was compassionate for my struggle.

After sharing requests, Pastor began to pray.

Everyone prayed aloud and I joined in my heart.

When we were finished, Pastor requested that everyone put their hands on me and pray for me.

As everyone gathered around and placed their hands on me, I was filled with gratitude.

As the first gentleman prayed, I felt a difference.

By the time our pastor was praying for me, I was praying too, aloud.

My voice had completely returned.

My cough had disappeared.

In one weekend, God has answered prayers in my life in mighty ways.

And I am so thankful.

Not just for the healing of my body, but for the way God has continued to show Himself to me throughout my life.

I’m filled with gratitude for those God has placed in my life, beginning with my family and extending to our church family.

I’m especially thankful for the prayers of righteous people on my behalf, for I know God is answering.

And I’m inspired, all the more, to live a life of testimony, that God may be glorified.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You so much for answering prayer. Thank You for giving me what is best, even if I don’t always understand. Lord, thank You for these moments in my life which are an opportunity to praise You! Lord, it is through Your stripes that we are healed and I’m so grateful for that. Lord Jesus, I know that no matter what physical issues we may encounter here on Earth, that we have the promise of complete healing in Heaven where we will put off these tents and be clothed: For in this we groan, earnestly desiring to be clothed upon with our house which is from heaven:. Lord, thank You! Thank You for the promises You have given. Thank You for the comfort and instruction from Your Holy Spirit. Thank You for the truth and hope we can find in Your Word. I love You, Jesus. Amen.

Farm life

With blogs, photos, and even magazine articles about hobby farms, it’s easy to think raising animals is idyllic.

It can be very rewarding.

But it’s far from easy, clean, nice smelling, or even relaxing.

Manure is an everyday issue, requiring a good deal of work.

Animals don’t always behave in ways you expect or want.

Rain, heat, snow, hail, wind, all is experienced while one tends to the needs of the animals.

Part of our farm life, lately, has been struggle.

I’ve spent a lot more time with the chickens, trying to remedy the issue of them eating their own eggs.

I’ve prayed for direction and wisdom.

God answered, one of our pastors gave us two old chicken coops, each worth over a hundred dollars.

I was surprised when the Lord gave us two more bottle lambs.

One a week ago, Lamby, and the other, Lenny, two days ago.

Sunday afternoon, I’d driven out to pick up Lenny.

I should have asked if he’d had a bottle before, but didn’t think of it.

It was obvious when I arrived home and tried to feed him.

He had no idea what I was doing and was refusing to eat, although he spent all his time telling me how hungry he was.

On Sunday night I realized Lamby had come down with pneumonia.

I started praying, because I didn’t have any penicillin, and pneumonia can be a fast killer.

I spent the whole night restless, especially after their midnight feeding, it hadn’t been much of a success.

Frightened that one or both would be dead in the morning, I struggled to rest in the Lord.

Each time I awoke, I started to pray, asking God to forgive me for my worry and thanking Him for this opportunity to learn and to trust Him.

I got up very early and went out with their bottles, and prayed the whole way.

Both lay separately on their sides, not a good sign.

Neither looked like they were breathing, but the Sun wasn’t up yet, so it was hard to tell.

Thankfully, the both got up when I unlatched the gate.

Lenny actually managed to get some of his bottle down, although Lamby didn’t get more than two ounces.

As I went about the other chores, I kept praying.

I was reminded of the two chicken coops in the shop.

They were an answer to prayer and it was the encouragement I needed.

“Lord, thank You for all Your faithfulness. I give You these two lambs and I trust You. Whatever their future, I know You are going to work it out for good. Thank You.”

And He has been so faithful.

After texting our other pastor’s wife, she sent her adult daughter and teenage daughter with medicine, gave the shots and left the penicillin for me to continue to administer.

I offered payment, but they declined.

I was able to convince them to take a dozen eggs home.

I didn’t get much sleep last night.

Not because I was worrying, but because I felt I needed to feed them more during the night.

They are both still alive, although I have no way of knowing if they will make it or not.

But I’m refusing to worry.

These are God’s sheep and I’m doing all I can to keep them alive, but the outcome is in God’s hands.

Ruth 2:12 KJV — The LORD recompense thy work, and a full reward be given thee of the LORD God of Israel, under whose wings thou art come to trust.

No matter the circumstance, learning to trust God throughout makes it a worthwhile experience.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your Word. Thank You for these animals and the lessons I’m learning. Thank You for teaching me patience and how to trust You with the outcome while prayerfully following Your direction. Lord Jesus, there are many areas of my life in which I struggle with fear. I thank You for calling me out on this and teaching me how to repent quickly, how to replace fear with trust, praise, and peace. Lord, thank You for holding me up through all these things. Thank You for making me well enough to handle caring for these little baby animals. Lord, these are Yours and always shall be. Not just the animals, but the precious people in my life. I trust You with each one and I thank You for them. Please continue to help me apply what I’m learning to every aspect of my walk with You. I love You, Jesus. Amen.

Adorned themselves

These two lovely people are my husband’s grandparents.

Both of whom have left a legacy to those privileged enough to know them.

Their characters are still spoken of with warm regard.

Although, I only met her twice, Grandma was everything I’d been told.

Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God. For in this manner, in former times, the holy women who trusted in God also adorned themselves, being submissive to their own husbands, I Peter 3:3‭-‬5 NKJV

She definitely applied these verses to her life.

Not only did they raise ten children, she cared for Grandpa when he developed ALS.

His development of the disease was slower than the average and she cared for him for many years.

After his passing she continued to be involved in her children and grandchildren’s lives.

It’s an example I want to follow, an inheritance I want to honor, a legacy I want to continue.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your Word. Thank You for these dear people who are my husband’s grandparents. Lord, please help me to adorn myself with trust in You, submission to You, Your Word, and my husband. Lord teach me how to wear love, bringing honor to my husband and children. Please show me how to put on a gentle and quiet manner; how to be hospitable, generous, prayerful, and applying Your Word to my soul. Lord, please help me to follow in the footsteps of other godly woman who have left a legacy of glorifying God to their children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. Thank You, Lord Jesus. Amen.

Manure

I can’t recall how old I was, but the memory is vivid.

My parents were taking us to a party at a home we’d never been before.

The people hosting were known to my parents, but not to me or my younger sister.

I had secret hopes of playing outdoors with other children, but my thoughts were diverted away from these plans after we got out of the car.

“What is that smell?”

The odor grew stronger we walked down the sidewalk.

We turned into the path to the door and I was puzzled by the stuff which covered the lawn.

Where every other house had green turf, this had a lumpy brown stuff.

My parents cautioned us not to mention the smell, hold our noses, or to make faces as we waited for someone to respond to the doorbell.

The nice lady who answered immediately apologized for the smell with an explanation.

“Well, I don’t know how we managed it, but somehow my husband and I miscommunicated and he ordered a truck load of cow manure to cover the yard today. I’d sent out the invitations for this weeks ago and couldn’t change it.”

She laughed and ushered us inside.

My parents assured her they didn’t mind at all.

The party wasn’t ruined, it was lovely and we left having enjoyed our time.

(And although I didn’t get to play outside nor were there other children our ages, the grownups included us in their game.)

Funny how perspective changes one’s outlook, even upon a childhood memory.

I can imagine, now, how trying that must have been for the hostess.

(Talk about a stinky situation!)

But I’m thankful she didn’t allow the manure in their yard to hinder her from opening her home to others and celebrating.

I’m also impressed that she didn’t, as far as I was aware, hold a grudge against her husband for ordering a load of manure the day of her party.

Which has brought me to a Biblical truth.

In life we can and will experience moments where someone has dumped a load of manure on us.

And…

I’ve found my faith often grows best when I’m wading through some stinky situations.

Times I’m working hard to follow Christ’s example are actually exactly what draws me closer to my Heavenly Father.

Times God uses, because He knows what will grow my faith, strengthen my walk, and cause blooms of praise to burst forth.

Not unlike how a plant grows and produces more after being fertilized.

Although manure isn’t pleasant, God can and will use it.

My responsibility is to be humble.

Not hold a grudge.

And continue to open my heart and life to those the Lord brings.

Romans 8:28 NKJV — And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your Word and the reminder that You work all things together for good to those who love You and are called according to Your purposes. Lord, thank You for reminding me of this moment in my childhood which I haven’t thought of in many years. Thank You for the blessings I can see in my garden when I apply manure and the encouragement I can have knowing that the stinky stuff of life is an opportunity to grow my faith and blossom in praise and thanksgiving. Lord, my life is Yours. I am Your servant and I trust You with whatever the future holds, for I know You are with me and that is enough. Thank You, Jesus. Amen.

Inability is a gift

Last Friday our church celebrated by enjoying a Seder Meal.

I was so blessed to get to be a part of organizing it, but I had to ask for a lot of help from many people.

My husband had warned me at the beginning not to try to do a bunch myself, but instead to ask for help.

Which I did, and it was a great blessing to many.

But the Lord had to correct me before I got too far into the planning, for the truth was, I was embarrassed to need so much help.

I want to do things myself, I told the Lord and then realized the error within.

This truth humbled me, because pride is sin and the Lord reminded me of another reason I find it so difficult to ask for help: I want to be in control.

Which is also sin.

For not only can I do nothing without the Lord, who gives me the gift of being able to do things, but I don’t own anything including my time or myself and thus shouldn’t even attempt to control things, that’s not my job.

It’s God’s.

I was bought with a price (a very high price) and therefore it’s important that I live in total surrender, humility, and true love with my Lord Jesus.

I’m still finding it challenging to patiently admit I’m unable to do things.

But I’m so thankful to God for showing me my heart’s errors so I can repent and change my perspective.

To be reminded of the gift of inability has been a blessing.

For, I don’t want to sin nor to live in rebellion against the Lord.

Instead, I want to be thankful for the limitations which reveal my heart’s motives and remind me to keep my priorities honorable.

I’d rather be unable to do things and have a growing relationship with my Savior.

Psalm 51:17 KJV — The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank You for Your Word. Thank You for teaching me to be broken before You. Thank You for reminding me I have no right to be prideful, no right to be in control. My life doesn’t belong to me, it’s Yours. Thank You for reminding me that I am Your servant. I am nothing without You, for all my good works are filth, because my motives can never be right without You cleansing me through Your salvation. Thank You for doing so. Thank You for washing me daily in Your Word. Thank You for teaching me so many things and Your patient understanding of this slow learner. Thank You for Your Word and Your Holy Spirit which convicts me and renews me. Thank You for removing some of my abilities that I might realize they were never mine in the first place. Thank You, Jesus for all You do. I love You. Amen.