Learning trust through pain

Our landscape is painful.

Some areas are worse than others.

But it’s a reminder of trust.

You see I didn’t want to cut those trees down.

I loved that part of our yard.

But the trees don’t belong to me.

They are God’s.

They had to go, they had to be removed so we can build.

A nagging doubting voicing questioned me the first time I walked among the stumps: “what if you got this wrong? what if God didn’t want you to do this? what if you cut them for no reason?”

But, I recognized the voice.

It wasn’t Jesus.

So, I prayed and told the Lord how much I trust Him even if we never build.

I trust Him if we did mess it all up.

I trust Him even if we have ruined our yard needlessly.

And a light shined inside my heart.

It revealed the truth.

Trusting God through pain, failure, and even in tragedy is trust at its best.

Like a small child holding onto their Papa’s fingers and walking through a forest.

They have nothing to fear.

If something dangerous were to come, the child trusts they will be carried through.

If the path is longer than the child can walk, they trust that there will be rest.

And as a child doesn’t understand directions,

they don’t even worry about which way they are going.

They don’t need to know, because they trust the one guiding them.

When things are painful or what looks like failure from my perspective is simply an opportunity.

I don’t have to know what lies ahead in my path.

Because I already know I can trust the One who is holding-walking with me.

“Dear Jesus,

Thank You for teaching me a new depth to trust. Thank You for all these lessons You have been walking me in. Jesus, today has been tough. I’ve received news which has troubled my heart, but I’m placing those things in Your hands. I refuse to allow fear or doubt to shake my faith in You. But I can’t say I feel happy about these things. Yet through the sadness and pain I look to You. I trust You, Jesus. I know You have a perfect plan and I’m so thankful for it. Even in these sad moments, I am glad I can share all my heart with You. I love You, Jesus. I look forward to seeing how You are working all this together. “

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