I don’t have to understand

It’s slow.

And some days it seems to be missing.

But learning to be thankful is what is healing me.

No, it doesn’t always make me breathe.

It’s healing my soul.

It’s wiping away worry.

It’s cleaning out fear.

It’s uprooting disappointment.

And

It’s teaching me,

I don’t have to understand.

I can choose to praise God, to thank Him

in

all

circumstances.

Perfect example was this week.

I just felt I should get on Craigslist.

That’s an uncommon thing for me.

So I’m trying to figure out what to look for.

Type furniture.

So, I do and my idea is I’m looking for a new bathroom vanity.

On top of everything else, ours needs to be replaced.

I look at all kinds of stuff.

Kind of wondering why I’m doing it, but God said…

A picture of a hutch catches my eye.

I’ve not had a hutch in 10 years, but I love them.

I scroll through the pictures.

-Wow-

It’s everything I’d want…

But I don’t have room for a hutch.

You do in your bedroom.

Oh!

I could get rid of my bookcases (which are a major chore to keep dust free) and store me books in the hutch!

“Great idea Lord!”

But…

Maybe this is just my own desires…

What if I’m just wasting our money on my wants…

What if…

-sigh-

“Lord, help me to know that this is Your will and not just me.”

What did David do?

The Bible story about David’s zeal to build a house for God came to mind.

God forbid David from building it because he was a man of war.

But that didn’t keep David from showing God how much he loved Him and how dedicated he was to God having a temple.

David began gathering things which would be used to build the temple.

And in that Bible story I found my answer.

“Thank You, Lord. I’m certain the hutch is going to help me keep up our room tidy and clean and beautiful. I’m sorry I was afraid.”

I still have no idea what we are going to do with our house.

But my room can be a place of rest and beauty.

A space where I spend a lot of time anyway.

And maybe, just maybe preparing my room to be clean and beautiful will in a small way prepare for future things.

I don’t have to understand why.

I can just praise God and today I’m thankful for the beautiful hutch sitting in my room.

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