Do you ever feel like a failure?

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You know,
those days where you want to lay down and quit.

This morning started to feel like failure.

I woke promptly, without an alarm at 5:30.

This surprised me since my husband had received a call at 2:30 and neither of us has been able to go back to sleep easily.

Yet as I lay there talking with the Lord I realized why I was awake so early.

Today is the first day of the State Track and Field.

Bell will be running today.

The bus is leaving at 8am for the two hour drive.

I wanted to be sure to get a solid breakfast ready for her as well as a lunch.

I thanked the Lord for my early morning and quietly snuck out of the room.

As breakfast prep was nearly finished my thoughts turned to lunch prep.

Shoot.

No bread.

There’s a sandwich leftover from yesterday’s lunch.

AWESOME!

I washed, peeled, and sliced carrots.

Coach said she needed some easy carbs.

I’ll bake muffins.

There’s no milk.

At this point my attitude began to degrade.

I thought about the 45 min drive to town yesterday when I could have purchased all these needed items.

I thought about my carelessness of not saving some milk.

I thought…

I’m still in control. Do you trust Me?

-sigh-

Yes, Lord, I trust You.

I stopped and confessed my sin of thinking this was all my own effort, of leaning on my own strength, of being willing to allow circumstances to hinder my morning.

I just stopped completely and prayed.

After getting my heart back to order, I told the Lord I trusted Him to guide me even in this.

Remember the crazy cake.

Hmmm….

Yes, it’s a recipe I received from a friend years ago, who upon hearing me explain I had not made a cake for one of our children on account of no eggs and no milk.

She had been so sweet about it and explained it didn’t require either and was easy to make.

Where on earth is the recipe?

It’s in your holiday binder.

I’ve never made it before.

There’s always a first time.

You’re right Lord!

So when Bell came in the kitchen her breakfast was hot, her lunch was nearly finished, and her mom was smiling.

I explained that as soon as the cake was done it would be packed into her lunch and she’d be set.

As we joined together to pray for her before she headed to the bus I could focus on the words without so much as a hint of failure.

On my own things go poorly.

But God never asked me to do it without Him.

How good it is to trust in the Lord.♡

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