Summer school began this week.
The day of someone walked in and looked at me.
I was busy preparing the last few details for our day.
“Don’t you get a break?” (In reference to teaching.)
I smiled, “Of course!”
“Well, do you do this every year? ”
I smiled more,”Nope, first time.”
What she didn’t know was how nervous I was at that moment.
Back in the late Spring the Lord had spoken to me about summer school.
He had given me a new way of looking at classroom time.
Our three younger kids all have school work year around due to their unique learning and I felt this summer would be a chance to help them fall in love with learning.
And the Lord has brought other students as well.
Yet fear kept me awake the night before class.
I knew it was fear, thoughts questioning my ability, my presentation, my lesson plans, even my science experiments.
The thoughts of what would I do if failure were to visit.
Yet in the quiet I knew:
Fear not, but have faith.
God had been the One to give me the idea.
God had shown me how to setup the lesson plans.
God had helped me find the experiments.
And God would be walking with me in the classroom.
I didn’t need to listen to fear.
In the softness that only His voice can speak to my heart he said :
There will be failure, but I will provide a way.
There will be success, and it should lead to praise.
There will be adjustments needed, but if you are willing I will guide you.
And after this week we had one experiment work well and another didn’t.
We have had to adjust both in schedule and in the classroom.
We have been able to feel success, as I heard from the students their enjoyment of the class.
And I’m still praying.
I know fear is waiting to rob me of the joys which come from faith.
I know God is in control and I don’t need to fear,
But it is still a struggle.
May God be glorified even in this.