Up close

image

Details,
can be elusive.

It takes getting up-close,
magnifying the miniscule,
focusing on what normally goes unnoticed.

Effort,
time,
tools,
talent.

But what are the details which are worthy of so much effort?

Lately,
it’s been my reactions.

The tools used to magnify the miniscule is the Bible and prayer.

The time has been in quietness before the Lord.

The talent has been to be real with Him,  Who created me.

The result has been to see myself a little clearer.

Busy with schedules and tasks and lists which check off one at a time, can keep me from noticing the prick, the nudge, the pull at my heart strings.

Who wants to stop and stare at the details, revealing the weakness within?

I honestly don’t.

But I am.

And I will continue to.

Because the details of my reactions tell me the opportunity to hone something inside my character is available.

Not only in the words out of my mouth,
but the sighs,
gestures,
roll of the eyes,
tone of voice,
or even in the stony silence,
my attitudes are revealed.

Pride
Stubbornness
Selfishness
Fear
Distrust

All these have been unearthed with my focusing on details.

They weren’t “in your face” but they were there just the same.

I could have found excuses for every occasion,
blamed each on circumstance,
dodged the truth and backed away…

Yet these words kept me from running.

“How can you, being evil, speak good things?  For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good things,  and an evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth evil things.” Matt. 12:34b-35

I don’t want to hide evil in my heart.

Even if it is only the smallest seed it can grow to ruin the beautiful.

I asked the Lord:

“Clean me Father. Heal my heart of the designs of sin. Give me love to replace anger and hurt. Humility to replace pride and haughtiness.  Faith to replace fear and distrust. Lastly, forgive me please for allowing the seeds of sin.”

With a
Deep breath
and
renewed strength my eyes catch Ps. 16:11

“You will show me the path of life;
In Your presence is fulness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures
forevermore.”

With this all I can say is:

Amen.

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