It can be like a door.


When it’s open new experiences and understanding can be obtained.

Especially when communication is happening between a husband and wife.

Inside every marriage there are walls that separate.

Some were constructed long before the marriage was built.

Others were put in place during times of stress or struggle.

Communication is the door to allow the other member of the house behind the wall.

“What if I am the one locked out? What if I’ve tried to communicate that I would like to be closer but my spouse won’t give me a chance?”

As the spouse who had locked a door I can say a few things.

First a wall is normally built because of hurt.

(There are walls built to conceal sin. But dealing with a hidden sin is different. Sin should never be enabled to reside in a marriage or a heart.)

After the hurt, the person builds to keep future hurt at bay. They mistakenly feel the wall will protect them and hide them from the shame.

Understanding the reason for the wall can help with unlocking the door.

Love, continually applied will grease the bolt, helping the key to turn.

Patience, will build trust and it takes trust in another to be vulnerable.

Prayer, for it is the Lord who can truly help one person open to another.

To those, like myself who have a locked door,
don’t believe the lie.

Locking your spouse out of part of your heart or life is destruction not protection.

Keeping hidden from the past doesn’t bring healing but fosters bitterness.

Refusing to trust your spouse is refusing to trust God. Do you have enough faith that God can speak to your spouse? Do you have enough faith to see God minister healing through your spouse?

I am not in your shoes nor do I know your circumstances but I have learned to open my locked doors to my husband.

After all I don’t want him to shut me out, how can I expect him to trust me with his heart if I refuse to trust him with mine?


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